A Venus Retrograde Flashback

A cover by the legendary illustrator Jack Kirby {{PD}}
A cover by the legendary illustrator Jack Kirby {{PD}}

A useful re-print, just in time for Venus retrograde:

Dating During Venus Retrograde

Hi, Julie,

This new blog is a great idea – inspiring and informational!

My question has to do with Venus Retrograde:

Living with mourning since the passing of a sweet soul last spring, it actually seemed like something in me began to move and open around the eclipses, suddenly the thought of looking for love again entered my mind. I have already gotten very useful information from your Venus Retrograde & Eclipse Reports, but one thing keeps puzzling me: What about dating during Venus Retrograde? This deep opening to all things Venusian (Venus crossing the IC) makes me want to open to possibilities, but the more I read about this goddess in backwards mode (books and internet), the more I doubt my own impulses to open to love & the world again at this time. Is this ’just Spring Fever’ or me going backwards at life & love?

I look forward to your insights on this, as I hope you will consider my question – I don’t think I’m the only one wondering…;-)

All the best,

P

Hi Ms P,

Thank you! And you ask an excellent question!  I’m sure you’re right, many would like to know the prospects for romance and relationship specific to Venus retro. When considering the dating picture, I think there may be two things to evaluate: one, where were you, dating and romance-wise, eight years ago when Venus retrograded in the same spot in your natal chart? It’s an important question, as you’ll meet the same issues in a new form. If relationships weren’t on the agenda eight years ago, chances are they won’t be again at this time, either, which suggests that other Venusian topics (finances and earnings, the values picture, feelings/ intuition/ sensitivity, talents, reward) will be. In that case, you just won’t be paying attention to relationships and dating for the retro period.

But, if relationships were the focus eight years ago, then they very likely will be again. Preparation for the retrograde involves an honest inspection of the concerns apparent eight years ago, and how the circumstances, situations, standards, and desires have evolved from that point to now. If you dealt with an unfaithful paramour at this time eight years ago, for example, your experience this time around may echo that one, with betrayal once again on the menu, or the period may bring the revelation that you have now established an intimate relationship that supports you–and you’ll be able to put the issue of unfaithfulness (and all the Self-doubt and questioning it brings forward) to rest.

The second consideration is, how well do you know what you want in life? Yes, you can get back to dating and relationships during the retro, if you’ve been away from them; but with the aesthetic, personal values, and taste changes that come during the retro (and flee afterward) we can find ourselves embroiled in something we don’t really want, that isn’t true to our innate nature, once Venus goes direct, so caution in terms of commitment and irrevocable (or difficult to correct) acts (sex and what this can expose us to, impulsive marriage, buying a condo together) is in order.

You make a good point, Ms P, when you speak of the “deep opening” to Venus energies that can be experienced at this time; and certainly, a profound opening to love is possible. With close attention to your inherent Venus nature, and flexibility in terms of entanglements and commitments, there’s no reason why the retrograde period can’t be a wonderful re-introduction to the pleasures and rituals of dating, as well as a return of romance to the life.

You might also like to read this http://juliedemboski.com/2008/04/02/is-your-mate-your-fate/

Will It Last? Venus Retro and Relationships

It’s on a lot of minds: if a romantic relationship begins during a Venus Retrograde period, will it last? It’s a good question, since our tastes and behaviors can be markedly different during the time Venus is in apparent backward motion in the sky. Every 18 months we go through an approximately six week retrograde of the symbol for love, relationship, money, and values, and it only stands to reason that an intimate relationship begun during might not have the staying power of one begun under a more characteristic influence.

This particular retrograde Venus occurred in the Cardinal Fire sign of Aries, with a single degree dip back into Watery, Mutable Pisces, where it stays for an unusually long time as it stations and goes Direct. In what sign and modality a planet has its retrograde will tell us something about the effects we can expect from the process. In this case, the majority of the retrograde occurred in an assertive, even aggressive, Self-focused energy that is physical action (Cardinal) oriented, and this is overall a way of expressing that Venus is likely uncomfortable with; and yet, she can find her way to express by playing on the less flattering sides of her own inclinations. For instance, desire can become envy, greed, or lust, while receptivity can become passive-aggression, and any Venus area, including beauty, love, or money can become an arena for competition and one-upsmanship.

So, the most important thing to keep in mind when trying to determine if a relationship begun under the retrograde has staying power is: does it have a facet of the competitive, aggressive, or a focus on Self-satisfaction? This doesn’t automatically say it won’t be sustainable past Venus’ Direction, but it does say that when Venus turns around what may have been a compelling and somewhat distorted form of Venusian energy will be withdrawn, and the consequences faced.

Those most likely to enjoy a survival of their love will probably have a natal advantage: Venus in Aries or another Fire 220px-birth_of_venus_detail sign, or in a Cardinal sign, Venus in the 1st, or Venus natally retrograde, and Sun, Ascendant, or Moon in Aries might also have a good shot at carrying the energy through direction. With those for whom Venus has had an uncharacteristic influence, the direction is likely to simply delineate very clearly what about the relationship is truly acceptable, and what really does need to fall by the wayside.

And what of Venus’ final sojourn in that last degree of Pisces? I think this brings a (perhaps desperate) attempt to paint the recent retrograde energy in a more acceptable light for the individual, prompted by the pressure of the stationary period. We may coat the relationship in fantasy, delusion, deception (even when presenting it to ourselves), or idealize things–these measures may or may not be contrary to reality, especially if we have deliberately set out during the retrograde to try something new. At the least Venus in the final degree of Pisces for direction says that we have in some way done the best we could under the circumstances, modeling our Venus experience on our ideals, and that once Venus is direct and moves back into Aries (just after midnight PDT on the 24th) we will be shed of anything that isn’t true and sustainable within our retrograde experience.

Dating During Venus Retrograde

Hi, Julie,

This new blog is a great idea – inspiring and informational!

My question has to do with Venus Retrograde:

Living with mourning since the passing of a sweet soul last spring, it actually seemed like something in me began to move and open around the eclipses, suddenly the thought of looking for love again entered my mind. I have already gotten very useful information from your Venus Retrograde & Eclipse Reports, but one thing keeps puzzling me: What about dating during Venus Retrograde? This deep opening to all things Venusian (Venus crossing the IC) makes me want to open to possibilities, but the more I read about this godess in backwards mode (books and internet), the more I doubt my own impulses to open to love & the world again at this time. Is this ’just Spring Fever’ or me going backwards at life & love?

I look forward to your insights on this, as I hope you will consider my question – I don’t think I’m the only one wondering…;-)

All the best,

P

Hi Ms P,

 Thank you! And you ask an excellent question!  I’m sure you’re right, many would like to know the prospects for romance and relationship specific to Venus retro. When considering the dating picture, I think there may be two things to evaluate: one, where were you, dating and romance-wise, eight years ago when Venus retrograded in the same spot in your natal chart? It’s an important question, as you’ll meet the same issues in a new form. If relationships weren’t on the agenda eight years ago, chances are they won’t be again at this time, either, which suggests that other Venusian topics (finances and earnings, the values picture, feelings/ intuition/ sensitivity, talents, reward) will be. In that case, you just won’t be paying attention to relationships and dating for the retro period. hearts_in_the_sand_002

But, if relationships were the focus eight years ago, then they very likely will be again. Preparation for the retrograde involves an honest inspection of the concerns apparent eight years ago, and how the circumstances, situations, standards, and desires have evolved from that point to now. If you dealt with an unfaithful paramour at this time eight years ago, for example, your experience this time around may echo that one, with betrayal once again on the menu, or the period may bring the revelation that you have now established an intimate relationship that supports you–and you’ll be able to put the issue of unfaithfulness (and all the Self-doubt and questioning it brings forward) to rest.

The second consideration is, how well do you know what you want in life? Yes, you can get back to dating and relationships during the retro, if you’ve been away from them; but with the aesthetic, personal values, and taste changes that come during the retro (and flee afterward) we can find ourselves embroiled in something we don’t really want, that isn’t true to our innate nature, once Venus goes direct, so caution in terms of commitment and irrevocable (or difficult to correct) acts (sex and what this can expose us to, impulsive marriage, buying a condo together) is in order.

You make a good point, Ms P, when you speak of the “deep opening” to Venus energies that can be experienced at this time; and certainly, a profound opening to love is possible. With close attention to your inherent Venus nature, and flexibility in terms of entanglements and commitments, there’s no reason why the retrograde period can’t be a wonderful re-introduction to the pleasures and rituals of dating, as well as a return of romance to the life.

You might also like to read this http://juliedemboski.wordpress.com/2008/04/02/is-your-mate-your-fate/

photo from www.2tietheknot.com